September BLUE Sky

Oops...I'm dreaming that September has just started...Have you seen TIME? Where did it go? I want to retrieve a piece of TIME that I lost in the month of September. Bummer, the technology is not capable of doing that yet. Ok, then... How've you been? I've been good and lazy, lazy and good. Since the summer has gone, everything around me is in a slow motion or rather there's no movements at all. I think I'm in a break after experiencing so many interesting events this year. Man, time for taking a deep breath then...

Looking up the dark blue September sky, I wonder how easily we/humans are prone to DO something restlessly? We even feel guilty or uncomfortable by resting in stillness, don't we? Well, some of you may be ok in that state, but I felt guilty ( for what? ) and also felt blue ( ha, nice pun with the title of this blog ) without getting involved with " things-to-do " in days. First couple of days were ok, then, I totally got bored and felt insecure afterwards. But I knew that being busy doesn't always means creating a better condition in life. We tend to forget living mindfully by being busy, yes? I needed to get off from a busy- bee treadmill and take time to look into my mind profoundly and mindfully. What's my search? I wanted to find an answer to this question : What do I want? 

The stillness was scary. I thought " the Nothing " of the Neverending Story was coming to get me. Seriously! My only task for a day was writing The Morning Pages. Other than that, I didn't have much plans to go somewhere or do something. I was mostly with me, myself and I at home or just strolling around the city to get a fresh air. The Morning Pages is a writing task for everyday. Three pages of whatever crosses your mind-that's it. Write it, don't look at it. Spit every clutters out of your mind and closed the pages. By doing so, I get clearer than before and it gets easier to deal with the things that really matter to me. and a good news is...I found what I wanna do! I have an answer to the question now. Yay! I'll keep it as a secret for now, if you don't mind?  I don't want the magic of my dream to be faded ;)   By allowing to have a little time to practice stillness and calm unfolds the sense of balance in our minds and lives. Am I living in the present mindfully now? I hope so. 

BTW, tomorrow is the first day of October, everyone. Any colorful wishes for the coming new month? I finally see a seed of my dream is growing. It's still a teeny-weeny sprouts showing the face above the ground in my heart <3  I need to take care of it as it grows big by watering, giving good nutrients and sunlight ( a ray of hope? ). I'll be patient till it gets matured.... I am exciting to see it grow! whoo hoo :D

Have a happy last day of September and enjoy a delightful Autumn taste in October!

Love and gratitude,

Hana

Simple Life

"Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans. -John Lennon "

I just happend to be there in Central Park and found this quote of John Lennon yesterday afternoon. It was an extremely fantastic weather, breezy and sunshine. All the trees and birds were celebrating LIFE! Under a warm ray of sunshine, I met an Italian guy who is an educator/life coach. We had a nice chat for a while. He may be another messenger from the universe? 

It's been a week since I was laid off. So far, so good. A new idea comes and goes...An image of myself in the future gets clearer than before. At first, I felt kinda awkward spending lots of time at home. I didn't know how to adjust myself into it. I now have enough time to read a book, take a walk in a park during the day ( aside from searching a job... ), breathe into a fresh air ( at least in a park? ), and seeing other people's life along the way is so powerful and inspiring. These simple things were missing while I had a full-time work at a flower shop. Being laid off is a painful matter, but I feel joy at this moment...The joy comes from a freedom. I've never got out of an ordinary life style : Work 9am-5pm, 5 days a week. This is my first time not having a job, but I tell ya...I'm having a great time of my life! Sometimes bitter, sometimes sweet. Life's got all different flavors. So alive. 

My cousin just sent me an email from Japan. She's recently moved in to a remote area in Kyoto, quitting her job, trying to adjust herself to a new life. It's an extremely small community that dosen't have much of an urban life style : No big super markets, no hot bars or restaurants to hang out, no cooking school she can offer her incredible talent. She used to be a cooking/baking instructor at a cooking school. Her passion was to bake all the different breads and to teach and share the fun with other people. Well, everything comes from a heart would be precious, isn't it? On the contrary to the inconvenience in her new daily life, she started to find a joy. She explains : I may have withdrawn myself a few steps behind from where I was before, but I've started to see everything in a beautiful picture. I had an enormous pressure to catch up with my assignments, work, and house keepings, but now... I have a time to enjoy outdoor life in the nature, buying seasonal vegetables and fruits from a local green market. I find a happiness in a very simple life. Breathe, eat and sleep. I'll start baking when we finish our kitchen renovation, so it'll be awesome! 

I found her story and my new life have something in common. We both found a joy in a state of being free. We are both free from our old comfort zones. Creating a new circumstance to live. Spring has sprung, summer is on the way. Our journey takes us to another surprise, another struggles, another happiness. Life is all good afterwards... :) 

What about yours? So far, so good, I believe...! I send you this pretty smiles of lily of the valley. They signify the return of happiness in the " language of flowers ". So, catch it!

Much love and kisses to you all, 

Hana

Transformation In Progress

Time flies...17 days of my Japanesy life passed so fast, and can't really believe it's been almost a week since my arrival in the US. Yes, I'm back in where I belong to. Well, New York is still my base camp at least for now. I may change my mind in the future, who knows? I trust in the ever-changing climate of the heart ( I borrowed the expression from Jason Mraz. Thank you. ) 

My trip to Japan turned out to be fantastic. My dad's surgery went well and he's recuperating faster than we expected! High 5 for his fighting spirit :) As the spring season kicks off with tons of cherry blossoms, signs of new life, hope, and happiness shows up everywhere we look around. Good to feel the vibes from the nature. 

oh, I show you some pics of those cherry trees in Kyoto before anything else. 

There were so many places you could go and see these beautiful trees throughout the city. Just amazing! Go and see those beauty next spring time if you can. 

Anyways...my spring dream life in Japan is over, I now face to a reality in NY. Ouch! Honestly, I would've stayed longer in Kyoto because I could stay away from this uncomfortable change in my life. Uncomfortable? Yes, stepping out from a comfort zone is very hard. I get lots of pressure and fear by putting myself in the unemployment condition. I can easily get lost in time and end up doing nothing. Here we go, my mind is trying to escape from the NOW. Boy, I thought I'm willing to take this change though? Fear makes me think of avoiding the hardship. 

You'll have to excuse my negativity. I'm a human, I have fears and dark side. Yesterday was one of those depressing day ever. Maybe a gray colored sky and rain added a grim impression to my feeling. Aren't we all have those day, are we? I wanted to lift my heavy heart, so I decided to give myself a gratitude every time I accomplished one thing. Here's the things I did yesterday : I sent out thank you notes to my relatives who visited and shared love with us while my dad was in a hospital. I called my mom & dad to check everything is ok, I read the instruction of filing unemployment...Most importantly, I splurged on sleeping! Need to get over with a jet lag as soon as possible... otherwise I won't be able to use my brain fully!! My language button also needs to switch into English not Japanese ;p Suffice to say, I felt better by the end of the day after acknowledging some improvements in my present situation. 

I found this quote on Superforest today : “Happiness comes from accepting the present situation, whether it is something you wish to savor as long as possible or change as quickly as you can.  Neither is possible without acceptance as the starting point, because without acceptance you are living on the periphery of your life.  There at the edges, you can’t fully enjoy the good stuff or do anything about the rest.” –Victoria Moran  Thank you Superforester Aaron, you made my day!

Time to make more progress...I'll see you all later ;)

Love to you all wherever you are, 

Hana

Anger Management Inc.

Have you ever lost your temper completely ? and feeling awful afterwards? I guess everyone has been there, done that before...right? I'm not a screamer, but yes, I throw things when I get irritated... Nobody sees it anyways? ah, right. I admit. I do this when no one is watching me. ha ha. I just wonder...why throwing things gives a chance to overcome the anger? hmm...am I dumping the feeling far away??? Interesting.

About a week ago, my employer/friend totally went bonkers. It was like a temporary insanity or some sort. Must be so hard to see things clearly when people lose their temper and drive everyone crazy. And the core of a matter is usually nothing serious. They get snap...because they are under a lot of stress or pressure throughout their daily life. You name it, trouble over a relationship, traffic jams, an event with a wrong time and a wrong place... Like it or not, we are deeply affected by those bumps in life.

How do you control your anger without disturbing others?  I find a good one! I try to shift my anger into peace whenever I push a fury button. How? Yoga. Stand in Tadasana, then move to Uttanasana, of course breathe accordingly.  I repeat this until the quiet state of mind starts to appear.  Luckily, I have a place to be alone at work, so it's perfect!  Learning to remain rational would be the best solution for " Anger Management ". I was content with what I did while he was bursting out his anger for nothing. He apologized later though.

I also notice how easy to hurt someone by words. You know, people want to defend themselves and blame someone for their unhappy condition. Throwing nasty words to others means...you create a gap between them. That doesn't help for improving the condition at all. Only by using considerate words to approach people would be a way to amend the problem.

oh, and how you can get rid of your stress? Well, you gotta figure it out by yourself. There are many ways to live without stress.  I practice yoga, accept changes in life, stay fresh each day, and know that each events are there to provide us for a new opening : An opportunity for a new possibility. Think about it, things are happening for good and bad. And we learn to be patient when everything is gone bad. Ok? Nothing is life-threatening. Where there's a will, there's a way.

If you need a guidance to live happily, go and read Joyologist Tricia Hoffman's blog, " I Am Being ".  She's good.

Let's maintaining a balance in life both good and not so good. BTW, the picture of a dancing ballerina above is a pun for this. ha ha. Hope your " Anger Management " is working properly.

That's about it. Enjoy your day wherever you are :)

Love, Peace, and Namaste...

Hana

After The Rain

It's been raining whole weekend since...Friday night. Saturday was one of those heavy duty stormy day, being drenched and miserable. Good to listen to this song, " Raindrop Keeps Falling On My Head ".

Despite the weather condition, I attended a yoga practice as usual. I needed it so badly since my yogi Steph was finally back from her trip! Yay!

Is this a trick of calming sound of raindrops? I was about to write something a while ago...then forgot.  I should've taken a scribble about it! oh, well...hopefully I'll be able to retrieve my memory sooner or later. Meanwhile, I wanna show you this amazing " onion " ( no, it's not a coconut ).  Isn't it nice?  What you are seeing here is a " life " !! A new life is just about starting its journey... or, it may be a new shoot of possibility? 

As I've said on my previous blog, spring is a time for rebirth. All the plants will soon sprout and animals and humans are going to be bouncy again. No longer lay dormant, a new life, a new energy are bursting out from each individual life form. This onion is no exception. How amazing to see the transformation!

Looking at the onion besides my bedroom window, a thought popped up in my mind : The onion's transformation is a form of a progress in its life. The progress is invisible when it begins inside of its body. And the same goes to our life, too. Although it seems there's nothing much different between today and yesterday or a week ago and a month ago, we're making a progress everyday. The progress toward our own goals, dreams, ideal worlds... We'll get to see a result of our progress sooner or later. So, keep up your good work, everyone! Can't wait to see a new shoot on your head!

Lastly...let me introduce my dad's recent progress. At age of 76, he's going on a open-heart surgery in April. He rejected it first because of a fear of possibility ending his life shorter...but then, he changed his mind. Wanting to see an ultimate good result on his health condition. He wants to dare not to be defeated by his heart problem. He wants to live more. What a beautiful word " Live", " Being alive "...! So nice to hear the news. I am totally proud of him. His surgery is risky, but I believe he'll make it. Since his surgery is scheduled around Easter, I call April 7th as my dad's resurrection day. It's a good omen, yes?   I'll keep you posted about his journey. Wish him luck, please? Thank you in advance ;)

Here's my pic with my dad and mom. 

I love you, dad. I always do. 

Hope you guys are having an awesome day!

Love & Peas...

Hana

Sowing A Seed Of Possibility

A messenger came to see me and gave me this quote : " So where in your life are you challenged right NOW? How could you take those exact same CIRCUMSTANCES and create an opening, A NEW POSSIBILITY, for yourself? "  It's a quote from one of a blog I read : Self-Examiner. Yeah, this is what I wanna add to my check list. I'm steering my heart to see how I can lead my life to a new possibility. 

This little messenger looks cute and sweet. How he got here? I don't know. He was there, a couple of blocks away from my apartment, but I found him right next door of my building a few hours later. hmmm.....he followed me???

His smile actually gives me a comfort. Telling me not to worry about the future. I assume he wants me to understand this : The most important thing is to enjoy every moment of life, both good and bad.  True. Being grateful for every moment will lead us to create a door to the next chapter in life. Am I right, Mr. Messenger? 

"Taking those same circumstances and create an opening", it sounds very similar to what my friend is doing with his artwork. He is currently working with his big project for his own sake. It requires lots of time and a strong will to accomplish the work. What he does is very simple, cutting paper into a same thin strip, weave those strips into a one sheet. Then he paints each tiny square with a red paint. He repeats the same process over and over till he finishes about 10 sheets or so. As he paints the square, the paint will be used up, so he adds more paint and water into a dish. There...the changes in color occurs. He just let the changes to happen. Trying to see the new possibility in his art. Some changes are not even visible...and the truth is none of those tiny squares are the same. Everything is different, everything is ok. Nothing is right, nothing is wrong. There's just a vast of possibility in abundance. I can see our life on his art.

We live up to the same routine circumstances day by day. Although it's easy to be swallowed by the momentum of passing time, I want to be aware of being in the NOW. By doing so,  I see the differences in life, then I'll be able to appreciate each moment of my life. I imagine those red squares in my mind as a trace of my life. Some are deep red, some are light pink...Creating a new possibility may be very simple. Just like what my friend does with his art work : Take the same circumstances and find a opening to a new possibility.  Try to be aware of what we do in the present. Be in the NOW, live in the NOW. You're already creating your new masterpiece...!

Time to snuggle down in my bed. Need to get up bright and early tomorrow.

Sleep well,  I see you tomorrow...

Good night, love always!

-Hana

If You Had A Magic Wand, What Would You Do?

Heyo, what's going on with you?

I found a blog about this young British chef, Jamie Oliver on  my fave positivity blog site "Superforest.org" a while ago. oh yes, I love love loooove his cooking book! If you don't know him, go to his web, and check him out! His cooking recipes are fantabulous!

BTW, do you recognize the material in the pic above? It's a one of my lovely colored yarn untwisted and a deep cerulean blue glass behind it. Loving the color so much ;)

oh, here's the link of the blog.

Make Jamie's Wish Reality

He recently gave a stunning speech on TED about how he wanna help people to fight against obesity and educate every child about food. This is his wish and the answer to his own question : "If I had a magic wand, what would I do? " His message is pretty intense and impressive. When someone talks with his/her passion, you'll feel it and it moves us to do something good. Very effective way to create a better world, yes? Here's the video if you wanna watch his superb speech.

...and now I'm thinking about my own version of answer to the question : If I had a magic wand, what would I do? Of course, my passion leads me to the answer!...but somewhat...I struggle to see what I really wanna do or what's my real passion is. I do love my work as a flower elf, then I ask myself..."This is it? Anything else??? Am I missing to see something behind it? " If I strain to see it, the mean fog immediately comes out and gives me a blurry image of my passion. I only know this simple core of the matter though : Whatever it is, I wanna feel happy. I wanna feel the same happy feeling I had while I was on a bike in the Netherlands. That bike ride trip gave me an insightful perspective of my journey. I saw my path I was on and believed the path was the right one for me. I was so sure that I would reach to the place I wanted be no matter how hard the wind blew against me. I felt joy and grateful for being ME.    Maybe, just being who I am, what I am would be my passion for life?

Well, there is another thing that I want to accomplish in my life by using the power of passion. I wanna share the happiness with my family, friends, and people I happen to encounter. I would spread love and kindness of flowers through my work, then I would be happy if I'm able to bring a smile on someone's heart. or, if I could send out the same good energy through blogging and be able to light up someone's heavy heart, that's also super sweet. hmm....funny. Writing this blog gives a way to see things clearer than before. My keyboard has a magical power? Interesting. 

It's sunny and bright here in NY today. Feeling a touch of springy air. Very nice :)

How's your magic wand? What do see when you use it? Let me know if something unthinkable comes up, ok? 

I'm off now. 

Enjoy the rest of Sunday afternoon!

Love,

Hana

Drink Lemonade, It's Good For You

Hey, hey, hey! What's up with you all? Busy weekend for a romantic night with your love? Ok, ok, fine. The Valentine's day is coming, but you know what? I have an inspirational story I wanna share with you all today.

Have you heard about an independent documentary film called " Lemonade " ? This was created by Erik Proulx who was laid off from a large ad-agency. Yup, he got a pink slip, then he found his life. hmm...I don't wanna say a lot about this short film before you watch, so....just click on a vid and enjoy. It's worth watching. I promise.



Whatever you do with your life, it's your choice. Choose wisely and don't fall asleep while you're creating your life / yourself  ;)

Ciao,

Hana

PS. Sorry, whoever lives outside of the US can't watch this vid...boo! Wait till it comes to your place in near future...ok? Meanwhile, you can browse their web site here! http://www.lemonademovie.com

It's 2:30am...do you know where your heart is?

Bummer...a jet lag is bugging me a lot! As my peaceful sleep time was disturbed by the persistent jet lag last night, my mind started to wander... then rise and shine! Here comes a bright morning. Sleepless, but gotta start a new day... oy vey ;p  Anyways...I posted my tweet/status on Twitter & Myspace several days ago and some of my friends commented on it. I asked this question randomly : Letting go of your possession is hard or easy?   So, what's on your mind? This has been a big issue for me somewhat. I often discuss about this with my shinyu / best friend by email.

Like it or not, we always come across to " hello and good-bye " on every event or beloved item /possession at a certain time in our life. How do you deal with it? Are you good at letting go of things? Be a master of letting go. Know when to release your heart from them. You'll be able to enjoy your life without any stress by doing so...I know I'm just talking about an " ideal "way of life. But it is true...I suffer if I hold those things so dearly. I prefer the things to flow...not to be fixed. hmm...

ok, imagine....you've got a coolest hat, loving it so much. then...oops! You left it at a counter of a coffee shop!! Ugh...! There's no way to get it back. What do you do if you're in the situation?? Think about the whereabouts of the hat for the rest of a day and feel unlucky and sad? or detach your thought from it completely and feel content with what you have still? Don't you think the latter seems happier?

What about this situation? You are having an super awesome time traveling in a foreign country. Your experiences made you strong and wise. You feel refreshed and happy.  Now, the vacation is over, back to your home. All you can think about is... the great memories of the vacation even though you have a tons of things to do in your physical world. It seems you're forgetting to be in the now. It's ok to cherish the past, but better not hold it. Because...we only go forward, not backward.

Letting go of what we love is definitely not easy. But sooner or later, the time will approach us to say good-bye to our attachments. We just need to work on how we can detach from them, and release our feelings from them when a right moment comes. Ebb and flow. This is a cosmic rule in this world, I believe. You know why it's hard for us to follow the rule? We are so afraid of making and accepting a change. Letting go of things means we're making a space for something new (condition) to come in. Yup, something new. Changes are coming, and we are not so good at being ready for them!

BTW, I read this blog long ago. I found it very interesting. It's about " ebb and flow ".  You'll see this artist's work visually and learn how he accepts changes and letting go of his attachments.

Sand Dancer

I llike this part in the blog : "Don’t fight it.  Trust Peter’s example:  the unstoppable tide is an opportunity for change, for rebirth.  Destruction is part of the evolution of beauty.  It’s elemental, inevitable and ultimately LIBERATING. "   

Well said. That's it. Go with flow.

Hope you find a way to a happy-go-lucky journey in your life :)

Love & Peace,

Hana