Oops...I'm dreaming that September has just started...Have you seen TIME? Where did it go? I want to retrieve a piece of TIME that I lost in the month of September. Bummer, the technology is not capable of doing that yet. Ok, then... How've you been? I've been good and lazy, lazy and good. Since the summer has gone, everything around me is in a slow motion or rather there's no movements at all. I think I'm in a break after experiencing so many interesting events this year. Man, time for taking a deep breath then...
Looking up the dark blue September sky, I wonder how easily we/humans are prone to DO something restlessly? We even feel guilty or uncomfortable by resting in stillness, don't we? Well, some of you may be ok in that state, but I felt guilty ( for what? ) and also felt blue ( ha, nice pun with the title of this blog ) without getting involved with " things-to-do " in days. First couple of days were ok, then, I totally got bored and felt insecure afterwards. But I knew that being busy doesn't always means creating a better condition in life. We tend to forget living mindfully by being busy, yes? I needed to get off from a busy- bee treadmill and take time to look into my mind profoundly and mindfully. What's my search? I wanted to find an answer to this question : What do I want?
The stillness was scary. I thought " the Nothing " of the Neverending Story was coming to get me. Seriously! My only task for a day was writing The Morning Pages. Other than that, I didn't have much plans to go somewhere or do something. I was mostly with me, myself and I at home or just strolling around the city to get a fresh air. The Morning Pages is a writing task for everyday. Three pages of whatever crosses your mind-that's it. Write it, don't look at it. Spit every clutters out of your mind and closed the pages. By doing so, I get clearer than before and it gets easier to deal with the things that really matter to me. and a good news is...I found what I wanna do! I have an answer to the question now. Yay! I'll keep it as a secret for now, if you don't mind? I don't want the magic of my dream to be faded ;) By allowing to have a little time to practice stillness and calm unfolds the sense of balance in our minds and lives. Am I living in the present mindfully now? I hope so.
BTW, tomorrow is the first day of October, everyone. Any colorful wishes for the coming new month? I finally see a seed of my dream is growing. It's still a teeny-weeny sprouts showing the face above the ground in my heart <3 I need to take care of it as it grows big by watering, giving good nutrients and sunlight ( a ray of hope? ). I'll be patient till it gets matured.... I am exciting to see it grow! whoo hoo :D
Have a happy last day of September and enjoy a delightful Autumn taste in October!
Love and gratitude,
Hana
I do wonder what it is that you want, but OK. I won't ask what it is;)
ReplyDeleteJust happy to know that you did some mind travel and found the answer you wanted:))
Well, I don't feel guilty about having nothing to do or whiling away at home or somewhere else without doing anything, but I too feel stuck and feel blue. Last weekend I felt that way. But we have biorhythm of mind & body, so it can't be helped that we sometimes very energetic and good, sometimes blue and bad; I don't think it's bad. As you said, it's the time to face self and travel into our own mind profoundly, I guess.
Hola, Akane-chan!
ReplyDeleteahh....I finally get back myself again! I felt drained so badly this past weekend. I enjoyed working with a lovely event designer, Melanie, and her team! One of the wedding my roomie and I did went perfectly beautiful! The photo is up on Tumblr ;)
haha, I have an image of my career destination. My final destination, that is. It may change the direction a bit, but the concept won't change : Love attracts Love. Love is all we need ;)
I know this kinda emotional ups and downs are needed. It's good to be feeling blue from time to time unless...it's severely affected in our life though. You know, having a true depression as a disease would be tough!
One day....I definitely wanna try your homemade bread!!!
Have a happy week :D
Love and gratitude,
Hana